The Soul That Loves, Flies
by MrsJme
Summary: Every time he even entered her thoughts Kagome's heart would speed it's dance. Gold eyes that seared her soul, sharp fangs made only to mark her neck, and strength she needed to protect her from the viscousness of the beautiful world. How could he possibly love her? Why would he not smile for her? Kagome would do anything to make her chosen male, Sesshomaru, choose her for his mate
1. Just a Note

Just to let you know this story will be a little americanized because I don't know much about Japanese history or language. I am trying to make sure to use the correct wording for everything though and doing research so please feel free to tactfully let me know if you see something misinterpreted. Also, you will have to remember that a year has passed since the end and people do change, even if they are demons :) but I will try to make this as close to character as possible or a reasonable transition. Please let me know, again tactfully, if you think they are wildly OOC or even just a little bit because sometimes this offers incite. I would love to hear reviews so please let me know whatever is on your mind.

Namaste,  
Jamie


	2. Chapter 1

Chapter Two:

Kagome was doing the one thing she knew a healer was not supposed to do, she panicked. She leaned down to press her face to the hard muscles of his chest. Breathing a deep sigh of relief as she realized his heart was still beating she tried hard to pull herself together. There were so many unexplainable emotions rising to the front but somehow she knew...she just knew that if he didn't make it she would never be okay. Somehow Sesshomaru was tied to her soul. In a twisted unfathomable way she knew her life was tied to his.

The hand that she held against his chest felt his heart beat a little slower, a little softer. It was subtle but in some way she had more knowledge about it inside herself than in the actual feeling of his heart through her hand. Tears fell from her eyes as she used his shirt to try to get the blood to stop flowing. No matter how often she tried to cleanse his body or how long she held pressure to the wounds more blood kept coming. Her tears fell faster as she realized that if he kept losing blood at this rate he would not survive long enough for her to help him heal. A tear fell to his cheek as she sat over him and his nostrils flared slightly. Slowly, almost as if he was upset over her distress his eyes cracked open and he moaned before he cut off the noise.

Kagome glanced up to his face. "Sesshomaru, I am here. Everything will be fine. I just have to get this bleeding under control. Try not to move. It's going to be okay." She slid her hand back up his side to soothe his blood soaked hair away from his face.

Sesshomaru reached up to grasp her hand and though the movement was fluid the motions were slow and calculated giving away his pain. "Miko, what you are doing...it will not help." He continued on at the look of confusion and desperation that crossed her face. "My body is bleeding to rid me of the poison left behind from the attack."

Kagome was beautiful in her grief, as if so much emotion could not be contained in the flesh of her body. Though she had always been open and free with her feelings. "Sesshomaru, you don't understand. You are already getting weak from blood loss. Your body won't be able to sustain you if you lose much more."

A flash of irritation swept through him at the thought of such a small, fragile human woman calling him weak. The feeling was fleeting however as he began to feel almost delirious. "Perhaps, female, that is insignificant," He stated in a cold voice. "Perhaps now life for this demon is only a hindrance." Through even after saying this he smiled, something so deadly yet breath taking. At least once he was able to address her as femal, the highest honor and most special endearment for in youkai women. She was entranced by his small smile even as her eyes widened at what he was implying.

Was he saying that he wanted her to just let him die. No! She couldn't. She just couldn't, not even if that was truly his wish. But what could she do. He had said it was poison. Wait...poison! She knew in her time when someone was bit by a snake then usually someone would suck out the poison so they could make it to a hospital to get the anti-venom. 'Would that work?'

It didn't matter. She had to try. Even with the situation Kagome blushed furiously as she settled on the ground and steeled herself for what she was about to do. Slowly she settled over him and starting with the wounds on his chest she placed her lips against his skin.

Sesshomaru jerked beneath her touch, curious about her intentions. Then she opened her mouth and began to draw the blood into her mouth. Unsettled he started to warn her before he saw her turn her head and spit the toxic blood to the ground. A bright woman, she was taking the poison from his blood. He knew that because of how long it had been she wouldn't be able to get all of it but she should be able to get most of it out and his natural resistance to poison would do the rest. His thoughts became fuzzy as her ministrations continued. It seemed as though his body felt less and less pain and more of her moving against him. By the time she had moved on to his navel he felt feverish but whether it originated from the wounds or the sight of her bent low with her mouth on his skin so close to the markings wrapping his hips he was not sure.

When she sat up abruptly he almost moaned again though this time the sound would not have been caused by pain. She looked down at him with her lips and chin stained with his blood and the sight was chilling. He should never have to see her blood stained. She should never be touched by that darkness, especially not the taint in his blood, the taint in his soul. "Is it...Did it help? Can you feel any difference?"

He looked at her with eyes gold streaked with red and it was one of the most beautiful things she had ever seen. Although this night of fear seemed to be full of images like that. Closing his eyes slowly he responded, "Yes, female, you did well. I will live through this. I need to sleep so my body can successfully process what poison is left. It may take a few days for me to fully recover but I am strong so do not fret." He felt amusement when he heard her sigh heavily in relief.

Minutes passed before he heard the constant rustles of her clothing though the sound was quiet. Looking over he saw her shivering. His guild was immediate thought there were no outward signs. Usually so calm his emotion were in constant chaos where she was concerned. "Why do you shake so?" He asked as if he did not know.

Kagome smiled sheepishly. "I'm cold." Then shrugging she said laughingly, "I never really learned how to make a fire."

Looking at this as a good excuse to get back to normal and think clearly again he said, "Go home to your warmth and safety, woman." Closing his eyes he figured he had adequately dismissed her without being unnecessarily harsh.

"I can't just leave you here after what just happened!" Thinking after her outburst that she didn't want to be insulting at all she added in a quieter tone, "I know that you are strong..." And did she ever... "but I just wouldn't feel right about leaving you here alone right now." Then just to try to sway him to her way of thinking she exploited any kind of feeling of protectiveness he might have. "Plus it's dark out and I don't like to travel in the dark, especially by myself."

After a moment a tiny sigh escaped him. She had a point. He did not want her traveling home at night without him there to protect her, though she would not know. However, she was not as convincing as she might think she was being. He knew her main reason for staying was because his female felt the need to protect him. With any other person the idea would have been laughable but in regards to this woman...this one woman the thought brought a feeling of tenderness to rest where his heart should be. That alone made him realize how she was set apart from every other being on this Earth and probably beyond. "Come, female, you may sleep next to me since your human body requires warmth." He used these words to remind himself that was just that, only human. However, instead of the revulsion he should feel at the idea he felt an insane urge to protect her from her own vulnerability. Kagome came and laid next to him quietly speaking her thanks. When time had passed and he realized that her shudders had grown less frequent but were still there he moved closer in the guise of settling in to sleep. Not long after when he was sure her body was relaxed did he finally allow himself to sleep.

Some hours later Sesshomaru was awakened by the feeling of his woman against him. She had settled her head on the uninjured side of his chest. The sight was breath taking even as the feeling was incomparable. Settling in once more for sleep, feeling content, he did not try to remove her in any way. He pacified himself with the knowledge that she would not know he had woke in the night to find them in this position. That he had allowed this. He could remove her from him in the morning. If only it was that easy to remove her from his thoughts and, apparently, his feelings.


	3. Chapter 2

A/N: The first thing that I want to say is that though this is my first debut on since I was a teenager I am also working on trying to write my first novel which I sincerely hope will be published one day. This is part of the reason it takes me a little while to update but I do promise to upload a chapter once every three days. This is also part of the reason I really enjoy reviews no matter what they say and I hope you will give me whatever thoughts are in your pretty little heads. I apologize in advance if Sesshomaru is at all OOC. I tried to avoid that very much but I find that he is a very tough person to put to paper. As far as Kagome goes from my best opinion she is passionate and tends to go with whatever comes to mind so I incorporated that but also I wanted her to be a little more mature as is fitting for human nature as we age.

I would like to say thank you to everyone that added me or my story to follow or favorite. I feel very honored that you think enough of my work that you would add me so quickly. I would like to say a special that you to LoveInTheBattlefield for leaving me a supportive review. Thank you! :) Sorry for such a long A/N but I felt I should explain a little and say thank you to you all. ***Jamie

**Chapter Three:**

Sesshomaru woke with the sun enjoying the pleasant warmth surrounding him which could not wholly be attributed to the aforementioned ball of gaseous mass. This feeling was wondrous and the mighty demon lord was honestly dejected at the thought of having to move her away from his body. He paused in thought for a moment to take in all the delicious details. Her legs were tucked between his in a way that one of her lush thighs were between his. In response his much more muscular thigh was nestled up close to her most feminine place.

Trying to remove her from his person right now was the furthest thing from his mind. Even as he battled with himself on what to do she shifted closer to him and her pouty little mouth opened on a sigh. She settled so closely into his body that it was possible to feel they were only two halves to one whole. His eyes became shuttered and he watched her face intently. Her eyes were closed loosly, her eyelashes creating inky shadows on her cheeks, her lips were slightly parted, and she breathed in small huffs that brushed across his bare chest. She looked peaceful so he thought if she was dreaming the imaginings must be pleasant. She stirred again which let him know she would wake soon. Even so, even after he told himself that he would rectify their position so he would not be found compromised, he could not bring himself to move at all.

Her breathing changed and under his watchful eyes her own eyes slowly slid open until they were half lidded and feeling groggy she looked around until she caught his gaze. For the second time in her life, within forty-eight hours, she saw his beautiful gold eyes were streaked with red where the crimson ringed his irises and jagged lines shot through to his pupils leaving the rest of his eyes a molten gold color. She had seen his and his half-brother's eyes be only gold or be only red but she had never seen them be both colors at once. The action struck her as a strange one. Before she could continue her thoughts she realized what kind of position she was in. Blushing she hurriedly backed up off the handsome demon lord. Her head told her that this was not acceptable while her heard demanded she savor this moment for the rest of her natural life. Logic said that she should not care so strongly for someone she didn't really know and who certainly did not feel the same way about her. However, her emotions claimed there was no excuse for not accepting this gift and welcoming it with open arms. She was torn. Honestly, Kagome recognized enough of herself to realize that she was an emotion based creature and she prided herself on always following her intuition.

As for Sesshomaru his mask broke for a moment as she pulled away from him and he almost didn't stop a moan from leaving his lips due to disappointment. Getting himself back under control quickly he looked up at her and was pleased to discover his female had not noticed his slip. She was blushing prettily and seemed to be momentarily lost in thought. He sniffed lightly at the air and was able to discern the gist of her thoughts through small while also catching a faint scent of her arousal. Though he knew he needed to keep his distance from this delicate, _vulnerable _human he couldn't deny he felt pleased with his findings.

After a long pronounced silence Kagome spoke up. "I should probably go get you some food. I'm sure it will help you to restore some of your energy." She paused. It was still hard for her to believe Sesshomaru had been so severely injured. When she thought of this man it was easy to picture him as being the epitome of strength. "I just..." Her voice trailed off.

Feeling puzzled he just stopped himself from tilting his head to the side to study her quizzically. "What is it you are thinking, woman?" His voice was slightly a lower tone that usual and he inwardly berated himself for allowing even that slight show of feeling.

She looked up at him and it was as if her mind couldn't process her thoughts together and realized what her mind was telling her. Strength so powerful, so magnificient, could be brought so close to death. This was truth. If this was true then what did that mean for a small mortal woman that played at being stronger than she actually felt everyday. Funning around putting her life in danger for others constantly. She would not regret fighting for those who could not fight for themselves but it really did put her time on this Earth into perspective. Perhaps she did not have eternity to just let the best things in life happen to her. Remembering that Sesshomaru was waiting for an answer she decided to follow her intuition after all. Slowly raising her face to meet his eyes she whispered her response. "I just feel so very human right now." When he only stared back showing no emotion as per usual something raced through her body so quickly it actually felt as if she shook from the force of it. Kagome felt almost as if something foreign was introducing thoughts into her mind. This foreign entity, however, felt like an integral part of herself. It was like they were dependent on each other, inseperable. Unable to focus on these thoughts for long all she could think about was getting the all powerful demon before her to show her some kind of emotion. She wanted something only she could see that she could keep with her in memories if nothing else. Suddenly the idea didn't seem so bizarre, the consequences mattered not at all, and she knew she was going to enjoy getting a response in the best way possible.

Not having time to react to her movements or figure out what she was doing. Sesshomaru sat frozen when Kagome suddenly perched herself in his lap. Careful not to abuse his injuries she straddled his legs with hers and placed her lips directly before his.

She gave him a moment of clarity to move and when he didn't she took that as a small victory. She didn't, couldn't wait any longer. She sealed their lips with passion. Sesshomaru sat beneath her and allowed himself to endure her pleasurable torture. He knew that this was a moment he would never forget during his long existence but he could not allow himself to encourage her for he would not take her as his own. So while he did not want this to ever stop he would not return the kiss. It seemed to him as if she poured herself body and soul into the kiss and for him it was magical and touched places in him never reached before by another. So, even though he did not participate he did part his lips slightly in an effort to prolong the contact for a least a little longer. She kissed him with such fervor that for many moments he did feel like the sparks she shared of herself would ignite his soul. He had never felt such fundamental torment. When he didn't add any flame to the action Kagome began to kiss him with a gentleness no being had ever shown him before. He could feel her lush lips moving against his own, fitting perfectly, even surrounding his bottom lip and lightly sucking on it. This was different from the fire in the beginning of her kiss. It felt slow and deliberate as if she gave this kiss only to him. The bewitching movement of her lips dancing lightly against his had the power to shatter him into pieces only she could pick up if he let it. Steeling himself against this power she seemed to have over him his body stiffened.

Feeling him go rigid against her Kagome pulled her thoughts together enough to realize he had not responded for the entirety of the kiss she had wanted to share with him.

Mortified and vulnerable under his red and gold stare she squirmed in his lap. She licked her suddenly dry lips. "Sesshomaru, won't...won't you kiss me back?" So quiet was her question he may not have heard it if he had not had enhanced hearing. She shifted against his body again and touched his lips again sweetly, so sweetly. This kiss only laster a few seconds when he still did not respond beyond letting her do as she wished. She broke from his lips a second time. Blushing fiercely out of embarrassment and a perhaps misplaced desire she spoke softly again. "I feel as though if I don't do this now I will never get the chance. Please, I know this may be strange for you but can you do this...for me?" As strong and as confident as Kagome was trying to sound her voice broke at the end of her query.

Sesshomaru was suddenly angry. Their situation was so hopeless. He couldn't let himself take her because of her mortality. Any intimacy they shared would become bitter and painful when he became forced to watch her age and die while she watched him do the opposite. Still he wondered how, when she touched him on so many different levels, was he supposed to just sit by and watch her slip from his grasp forever. Humans were so passionate in their short lives that surely eventually she would search for companionship to dispel her loneliness. Perhaps that would be best for not only him but also for her. His beastial instincts certainly could not stand the idea.

Unwilling to continue the painful train of thought Sesshomaru broke the silence but as some of what he was feeling slipped into his already cold voice what he said came out venomous and growled. "I am not a dog to obey your wishes. I crawl for no one, woman." Rage over the despair creeping into him made his next words sound like something dangerously close to a roar. "I certainly will not crawl for a human woman who is beneath me! Not even for you!" He spoke not only to his female but to whatever fates were cruel enough to deem her his. Breathing hard Sesshomaru fought his beast nature from rising up in him to take over, something that had not happened but a handful of times in his amazingly long life.

Kagome jerked so hard from his vicious tone that she fell back to be cradled between his parted calves. So shocked was she that she didn't even recognize the implications of his last four words, their significance. Shaking visibly she concentrated hard to try to make her response understandable. "I didn't...wasn't trying to...I would never try to order you to do anything. What I said, it was only a request. I apologize. I see that I have overstepped boundaries. I...I will go and get you some food now. I'll be back soon." During her stuttering speech she withdrew from him more than just physically. He shuddered with the want to bring her back close to him to shield her with his strength even from himself, and he cursed himself for the worst kind of heartless creature. Before he could lose any further control and do anything that might become regrettable later she sprinted a small distance away from him and turned back quickly saying sorry while he discovered some unknown emotion in her eyes. After that she hurried away from him and he watched her retreat until he could no longer see her weaving through the trees. Once she was entirely out of sight he actually groaned out loud. The sound turned into a fierce growl that reverberated around him in the otherwise silent area. Feeling were dreadful. It was enough to almost make him want to return to his prior existence. The worst part of this situation was this nagging doubt that filled him. It refused to be silenced and had him wondering if he had even made the correct decision. What would it be like to claim her as his own for the whole world to see? Would it be better to have her for the entirety of her short life and face pain or to never have her at all and face this guilt and despair? The demon lord sighed almost silently and for the first time since all these feeling had made themselves know he allowed himself to ponder their meaning. It was comparable to trying to riddle out the stars.


	4. Chapter 3

Sesshomaru threw his head back against the tree he sat under and pierced his claws deeper into the dirt. How did the higher powers expect him to be able to leave her be? Or was that exactly what this was; divine punishment? Maybe for all the wrong he had ever done to the world they would use her sweet form to smite him after all. The one thing that could fully be labeled a weakness that wasn't already under his care and his legendary control was fractured. A sigh left his lips as he resigned himself to simply waiting for his female to return with nourishment.

Kagome was not being coy when she told Sesshomaru she had never learned how to properly create a fire. She returned to her hut which was just this side of the forest and gathered the items needed to make a stew. Initially she thought to make it mostly broth but then she remembered that being a demon he would heal particularly quickly and that must use a great deal of energy. Also, considering he was inu youkai his diet probably consisted mostly of meat. So she grabbed everything for a hearty stew, doubled the meat she would usually use for herself and headed for the community fire.

Hopefully, Sesshomaru had nothing against venison since that was what she found easiest to hunt. She sighed as she prepared the meal and then sat back to wait for it to cook, stirring occasionally. Life in this era was anything but easy for a modern girl. It had only become more difficult as her friends slowly moved on with their own lives and she was left to fend for and educate herself. For a girl who constantly brought conveniences from the future back with her it was all a large shock, especially when the well stopped allowing her passage to and from her original home.

In her beginning days alone, when she realized not everyday was a party, she had almost given up hope of ever being "normal" again. Despite her characteristic optimism her outlook became so bleak she was consumed by it. One day not very long ago life had seemed to be particularly difficult to deal with so she had sat down by the river lost in despondent thoughts, wondering how she was going to make it through life here when she didn't even know the basic skills everyone around here learned as children growing up. Once as she glanced up, staring blankly through the trees she saw for a split second what appeared to be white-silver hair floating on the breeze. When she blinked into focus there was nothing out of place and no sign of the beautiful hair. What shocked her senses the most was that her first thought was not of her food friend, Inuyasha, but instead she shivered as she pondered thoughts of a very powerful daiyoukai. Someone with eyes the color of the sun but a personality resembling the moon. Sesshomaru.

Thus became the realization of her honest infatuation with the male. The more she wondered at her thoughts and amazingly unfounded feelings the more confused she became. However, she also began to get stronger mentally as she strove to be here to speak with the moon every night and to greet the sun on the dawn every new morning. Somehow with no support and even without his presence Sesshomaru had become integral to her entire being.

Kagome stirred the pot a final time before placing a heavy metal lid on the even heavier pot before using her westernized apron to grab the handle. She had already stashed a bowl and spoon in a canvas bag that swung haphazardly around her waist. Beginning the daunting trek back to her demon she lost herself to thoughts of the situation.

Somehow throughout the years her thoughts of Sesshomaru had undergone some strange emotional change. Now she almost idolized him. So strong, she shivered just imagining the strength in his lean frame. She had now touched those muscles for herself. She felt a blush creep over her chest and face as she remembered even touching his body so intimately with her lips. These memories did nothing but expand her craving to make him her own.

Recalling his accusations earlier implying she was treating him as nothing more than a mundane dog was worse than a bucket of ice water. It didn't actually matter how she felt about him. Any action Kagome might initiate to create a closer relationship with him would only be seen as manipulation on her part. That kiss was probably one of the most magical moments of her life but he had not responded to any of it and became angry at her pleading with him to do so.

Wiping her brow she set the pot down to rest for a moment. Her lips were tingling in a delicious way. More! God, she wanted so much more. She hung her head and sighed. It was going to be difficult nursing him back to health when she was so aware of him.

Sesshomaru glanced to the sky judging by the sun that it was past midday. He would assume Kagome would be back soon and found himself hoping she didn't find any trouble. He sighed and brushed his fingertips over his lips. Images of her moving over his lap as she fervently kissed him filled his thoughts. Her sweet kisses had effectively stole the most precious parts of his soul.

The demon lord had never imagined that this situation would ever come to pass. He had known for years now that she was his fated mate but he did not want a human for a mate. Not because of any sense of inferiority but because selfishly he did not want to give his heart only to lose it completely. There were ways to extend life but not much could be done to increase physical strength or endurance. His female was certainly a beauty with a treasurable spirit; this he knew. He had not spent much time away from her in years though he made sure they had no interaction whatsoever. At times he had to fight his own instinct so that he would not go to her. It would not be fair to either of them to ever extend their relationship. Their lives would be difficult enough as things were.

Even though she knew nothing about his culture or the fact that she was divinely his, Kagome would develop unnaturally strong feelings for him. Sesshomaru surprised himself as a possessive growl escaped when thinking of her being his. It seems like the feelings were bound to be reciprocated, no matter his logical thoughts on the matter. He would just have to continue being cold toward her. That was the only way they would make it through this predicament relatively unscathed. The muscles in his stomach contracted as he thought about how passionate things could be between them if they were given an alternate reality. In appearance and personality she was everything he could have wanted and more. His breathing sped up as his brain involuntarily supplied him with images of how her innocent little kisses would've gone if he would've responded. He had fought like hell to leave her untouched; even now his claws remained buried in the dirt. His eyes slipped closed as he felt he once again settled in his lap.

His inner demon had wanted to demand complete control from his female. To dominate her into giving complete trust. His pretense had almost shattered when she had nibbled at his lip so damn sweetly and his fantasy picked up there. Kagome shifted her weight in his lap when she lazily bit his bottom lip. Growling, Sesshomaru captured both of her forearms in one of his large hands, locking them at her lower back. She gasped into his mouth making it easier for him to slip his tongue into her while increasing the pressure he applied on her arms. He forced her to arch her back so her body was flush against his allowing him to feel as well as hear the hitch in her breath.

His free hand found her jaw and traced the delicate bone until he found the curve of her neck. From there he traced her jugular down, down, down with his deadly claws and felt her shudder against him. Then he fiercely grasped her throat at the same time he skillfully returned the bite to her succulent lip, careful of his sharp fangs which had become more pronounced due to his arousal. With his grip he felt her cry out at the domineering movement.

He growled out loud as he imagined the sound of his female. His eyes flashed a brilliant red and he was panting deeply as he voluntarily allowed himself to surrender to these images of seduction again. To reward Kagome for being such a good little submissive he pulled back from their kiss and savored her disappointed whimper before roughly licking her stiffened nippled through the material of her kimono. She shuddered and cried out again before pleadingly thrusting her chest forward. Sesshomaru barked approvingly before latching completely onto the same nipple. Kagome began to rock her hips unconsciously, grinding her core against his hard cock.

This was the point when Kagome entered their camp. She set the pot down before her eyes found the spot where she had left her demon. Her lips parted when she got a good look at him. He had one hand buried in the soil while the other seemed to be caressing his abs. He had a slight sheen of sweat covering his skin, an arresting moan on his full mouth, and his chest moved with ragged breathes. Just when she would've worried his hips pumped forward and she gasped as she observed the restrained strength in that movement.

Beautiful, otherworldly red eyes snapped open and landed directly on her form before a fierce snarl left his lips. Strangely, instead of being frightening she clenched her thighs as she felt a warm gush coat her panties. Fuck, she just couldn't get away from this insane desire she felt for him. He tilted his head slightly and she realized he was scenting the air. When a deep rumble went through his chest they met eyes again and she felt a deep draw go from her clit into her abdomen. Her vagina clenched tightly and she felt weak kneed under his gaze, it was slightly surreal.

He blinked his eyes a few times and she watched as they returned to a more unusual color of gold with only traces of red. All of a sudden it was as though air just punched into her lungs and she was able to breathe once again.


	5. Chapter 4

A/N: I usually don't like to leave notes in my writing because it takes away from what's going on but I wanted to make sure everyone knew that chapter 1 is fixed and easily able to be read at this point. So far the only reviews I seem to have been receiving are that chapter 1 is messed up so hopefully this will allow for my readers to share more of their thoughts on the story and their creative minds with me. Namaste, Jamie.

Shaking her head vigorously Kagome grabbed the pot and brought it to a relatively flat section of ground before proceeding to ladle the still warm stew into a bowl. Confused, she was trying to puzzle out what it meant to find him during such an enticing moment after she had kissed him such a short time ago. She would have connected the two arousing scenes were it not for the cool disdain and heated disgust he had alternately displayed while telling her exactly what he thought of her. Her heart dropped to the pit of her stomach and she sighed dramatically. Honestly; the woman assumed the thought was so fleeting there wouldn't be enough time to feel hope but apparently there was, or she was just that desperate.

After filling the bowl she grabbed the spoon and covered the distance to the demon lord. Settling on her haunches at his side Kagome brought a full spoon in front of his mouth and patiently waited. Sesshomaru did notice that all of this was done without even attempting to make eye contact. That caused a sharp twange in the region of his chest. A feeling of guilt, he realized. "Why are you feeding me?" Though this was said in a confrontational tone he smoothly opened his mouth after posing the question and allowed her to touch the spoon to his tongue.

She swallowed a little self consciously while she watched his mouth then his jaw and the muscles in his cheek work as he chewed. Looking away she said quietly, "I just thought it would be better if you rested as much as possible."

He made a resonating rumble for a non-committal response and her heartbeat quickened frantically. Frustrated with her complete lack of control over her own body she grit out, "No more talking right now." After realizing that statement could easily be viewed as a command she added, "Please."

This time Sesshomaru just silently observed her every movement and facial expression. He couldn't believe things had worked out this way. He was trying to protect her by keeping his distance and not accepting her as his mate. Yet now, just because of a bizarre twist of fate, he was going to wound her on some level in order to fulfill a greater kindness. Without a doubt this encounter would cause her pain. No female can protect themselves against their mates rejection or efforts of rejection, even if they don't know who their mate is.

Sometimes life offered nothing but cruelty and though he knew with certainty that she deserved much better this was the best he could do. Demon's lives were long; in response so were their memories and grudges. His kingdom was still in full blown controversy over his father having intercourse and reproducing with a human princess. If he were to actually mate a human of no standing he couldn't even imagine the impact that would have on his land and people. One thing he did know without a doubt is that the assassination attempts on his delicate female would not stop for decades, if even then. This was his highest reason for keeping his distance. Let her live her life as carefree as possible even if there is an unrecognizable emptiness. At least then she's still alive.

Keeping his emotionless mask on he studied Kagome while she fed him. Her eyes were a deep sapphire that sparkled with uncertainty and vulnerability though she couldn't hold his gaze. As she looked away again his perusal moved on. Her hair had grown during her time here so that it hung to her perfect thighs in gentle waves, black as the night. As she preferred to wear her hair down she had braided it along the top and both sides of her head letting the rest flow free. He found this curious and endearing as many demonesses chose this fashion as well because it kept their hair from impeding their vision while still being stylish. Hair was a status symbol for their race after all.

Though Sesshomaru continued taking bites offered by the flustered miko he couldn't tear his focus from her. She had certainly matured into a woman. When standing she only came to his chest, making her seem even more fragile, but she had perfect breasts with a small waist and gently flamed hips. It could not be in any way helpful for him to be this close to her while he was very nearly waxing poetic about her in his mind but it couldn't be helped. This kind of thing was perfectly normal for a mate. How he wished he could actually be that for her, give her everything she needed.

Kagome cleared her throat before peeking up at him. She darted her gaze away quickly when she saw he was still focused on her. His blank look gave her a mix of feeling like he looked through her as though she didn't exist or that he stared straight at the dreams residing in her heart. In response she was unbearably uncomfortable and yet somehow she was proud of herself for capturing his attention. As she fed him the last few bites of the stew she found herself caught in thoughts drowning in frustration. The warrior before her was puzzling; she caught glimpses of something from him that created a viscerally female reaction in her and just when her desire driven brain thought she detected his pleasure she was slapped with his derision instead.

She had been stuck in a whirlwind of emotions that the last couple of hours seemed infinitely longer and it was exhausting. She had known from the beginning that her emotions concerning him were abnormally strong but she didn't realize that with physical distance so to came emotional distance apparently. As he took the last bite she sighed dejectedly, firmly tried to rid herself of her thoughts for now, and replaced the spoon in the bowl.

Dropping back to rest her bottom on her knees she had a fleeting moment of surprise when she realized that even with him slumped down relaxing against the tree she had to stretch up on her knees to reach him comfortably. She shook her head with a tiny wistful smile; he really was just so much bigger than life. "Would you like some more? Are you still hungry?"

After a few moments of silence his voice reached her in a low rumble of words. "That was satisfactory...female." Kagome knew she had know the quiet power of his voice since first hearing him speak, without ever needing to raise it a decibel he commanded the attention of everyone around him effortlessly. However, in that moment with his tone so resembling the thunder she had always loved she swore she had known it's quiet intensity all the days of her life and felt it would follow her into her unknown eternity. As though she were a slave to these new overwhelming desires her eyes rose slowly until they met his from beneath her lashes and her reaction was instantaneous. Her breathing grew shallow, a drugging warmth grew throughout her center, and she felt slightly light headed as she just took in the features of his face.

As Sesshomaru watched her body language, facial expressions, and scent changed many times. It was refreshing to see how open his little human was. It was also terrifying, something he couldn't comprehend as a youkai who chose to hide the emotions that he did feel as a survival technique. When he spoke to her and she finally looked him in the eye again his breath hitched at the unconsciously seductive look of her. She looked up at him almost shyly from under her long, sooty lashes, her blue eyes a bright contrast. She leaned slightly forward and her body shuddered before her breasts rose and fell sharply with her rapid breathing. Sesshomaru's body drew taut right before the smell of her arousal made his nose tingle and his claws lengthen. All things considered holy, just the smell of her was almost enough to make him want to walk through hell so he could beg to be made into a lesser being that he did not care for, if only to be with her. Her cheeks were flushed a becoming pink but it was all arousal. There was no trace of embarrassment and that tugged at his heart for so many different reasons. All of a sudden it became too much and his control snapped as a muscle twitched in his cheek.

Just as Sesshomaru had completely forgotten about any injury and was going to pin Kagome to the ground she blinked forcefully and sat back. Looking around in a confused manner she cleared her throat. "I have to change your bandages again. At least for today to make sure no infection sets in." She set the bowl and spoon aside to wash after bandaging the demon with fresh linens and stood to get the supplies she would need. She stiffened when she felt a cool wetness covering her thighs and weeping from her newly aching core. She stood frozen with her skin prickling from both awareness and humiliation. Knowing what she did about inu senses she knew he could smell her aroused state. Knowing she was blushing furiously and refusing to meet Sesshomaru's eyes she turned around and grabbed the dishes. "I think I'll just wash these first after all." She practically ran from him after the muttered words.

Sesshomaru watched her strategical retreat with regret and thanks. He and his least were only holding on by a thread. He had known the moment she had caught up to reality and put the pieces together and her embarrassment had smelled so sweet and she looked so cute and needy and damn if that didn't do something for him. He let out a deep sigh before dropping his head back to the tree. One tiny, powerless human woman would be the death of him if he didn't harden his heart and his resolve. A soft snarl floated away on the breeze.

As Kagome dropped gracelessly to her knees by the gently flowing stream she berated herself. She knew with certainty she was all types of a fool and she needed to get herself together if she was going to make it through treating Sesshomaru completely intact and she did not just mean in a physical sense. After washing the bowl and spoon she set about the task of brusquely cleansing her thighs and all between with the frigid water before righting her hakama. Giving herself a cursory once-over to be sure everything was as it should be she took a fortifying breath and started back toward camp.

Sesshomaru watched as she re-entered their camp. He was still being teased by just the barest traces of her arousal but had control of himself again. She was starting to make him wonder how he was supposed to continue to show her an icy facade when a hurricane of fiery emotions were tormenting him on the inside. The only option he had left to him was to fall back on a fabricated disdain he had centuries to perfect. His shoulders slumped imperceptibly; gone were all his hopes of leaving his female unharmed. A vision of her body broken and bloody crossed his mind and it was almost enough to leave him visibly shaken.

He strengthened his resolve in that moment. Nothing was worth her loss of life. Even if he had to cost her momentary pain at least when he left her she would still have her life.

Kagome sighed as she settled down a few feet away from Sesshomaru and pondered what the next few days would possibly be like if today was anything to go off of.


	6. Chapter 5

**_AN: I apologize about the long pauses between updates. I am very much enjoying writing this story but it is taking me quite a bit of time to get it out for many reasons. I work 40+ hours a week, am a full time college medical student, and have 3 children with disabilities that require a great deal of my time. Also, I have never before written a story that revolved so much about the thoughts of its' people instead of the actions and dialogue but this is how it seemed to want to be so here it is, just slow coming. Lol. Enjoy, my darlings. Namaste, Jamie_**

Neither demon nor priestess could possibly tell how many hours had passed during their oppressive, thoughtful silence. As Kagome assessed his body, in no way medically, from toe to tip she had to suppress another shiver. Honestly, she had no idea what had changed her but that was only the most recent of about a thousand sexual responses her body had regarding the youkai before her. With that thought Kagome blinked thoroughly before glancing up at the sky. Gasping, she moved quickly to gather all the provisions for sleeping and dinner. While she had been lost to her worries the sun had almost completed its journey through the sky and it was now sunset.

She dished a couple bowls of the stew out, being sure to give Sesshomaru and extra spoonful with plenty of meat. Thankfully due to the size of the pot and keeping the lid on it between meals it was still just this side of warm enough to eat. Tomorrow she'd probably have to trudge the whole thing to the village fire to heat it again and back. Sighing, she put those thoughts from her mind. She settled on her knees beside him again and this time he glanced from the bowl to her eyes before silently, just barely opening his mouth as he held the visual contact. Though his expression never changed his eyes were a living thing upon her that smoldered with well-hidden heat. How had she never noticed the depth of color in his irises or the way a brilliant ruby hue would quite randomly ghost over or swirl through them? It was almost mesmerizing.

With shallow breathing and a rapid pulse she hoped he was inclined to give no notice to she began the sensual torture of feeding him, one bite at a time. Each time she saw the glint of his fangs peak out below his lip a purely erotic current swept through her. She could already tell that no task would ever be mundane with this man involved.

Sesshomaru watched his female's eyes glaze while her eyelashes dropped to half-mast and the prettiest pink blush painted her delicate cheekbones. Just the sight and smell of her was enough to have him instantly, violently rock hard and half mad. Already, his body vibrated slightly at the effort of containing the rumbles filling his chest that he instinctively knew would have her soaked with much more of her tantalizing cream. As it wasn't difficult enough to appear silent, he was literally forcing himself not to pounce on her and blanket her body with his own. It went against all his instincts for him to not express how much his fated female please him. Once she had accomplished the task of feeding him she quickly indulged in her own bowl. Once she had finished she stood and grabbed the two comforters she always kept with her sleeping bag. Thankfully she had thought to bring them with her. "I'm going to once again cleanse our bowls and then I shall be back," she told him as she placed the two thick blankets easily within his reach.

"Hn." She heard him reply stoically as she turned away and grabbed the dishes. She gave a quick glance back before disappearing from view. He did not like her being away after sunset though there was little he could do for her in his current state. Being cold to her was going to require a great deal of effort. Already his willpower was in a diminished state and he had only just begun. So many times he had made fists just to stop from grabbing her, had pierced his own flesh with his claws to dull the arousal that refused to leave his sanity untouched. He sighed heavily and allowed his head to fall back and hit the trunk.

A minute later she returned and put the eatery away before removing a length of strong twine from her bag. He watched her curiously as she threw it over a moderately high branch. Attaching one end to the handle of the pot she hoisted it into the air before tying it off. When she caught his gaze on her as she brushed her hands off she clarified, "So we don't lose our food or meet up with something nasty attempting to steal it."

"Hn." She sighed and turned away at his monosyllabic answer. Viewing her reaction, knowing she was disappointed, had a feeling twisting painfully in his chest. Would it really have been that hard to tell her how intelligent that was or even to just say 'good job'? No, it would have been delightfully easy but would also directly oppose his plans. He was growing increasingly frustrated.

When she entered her sleeping bag a short distance away and settled in for the night he was greatly displease over the distance between them. Again, he could say or do nothing. Fucking plans, he thought bitterly, and fucking fate too. "Good night, Sesshomaru. Sleep well," she said breathily.

Oh, the sound of her voice… "Hn!" He knew the frustration and anger he felt for himself had been apparent in his response. Sadly he knew as well that she would take it against her. But then that may be all for the best right now.

Kagome flinched slightly at Sesshomaru's clipped response. She should have realized that he would not want to listen to all her asinine little comments. She tossed her head as she rolled away from him to try to dispel her negative feelings. As one involuntary shiver went through her she settled into the fetal position for comfort and added protection from the chill as she had given Sesshomaru the blankets to use. However, she couldn't stop the depression that was irrationally carving a home inside of her. That night just like many that came after Kagome fell to sleep with a deep-seated feeling of heartbreak and failure…

The colors of dawn colored the sky in rose colors as Sesshomaru sat with his back against the tree in his signature pose, one knee bent with an arm crossed over it, his head resting lightly on the trunk at an angle, with his eyes closed in silent contemplation. Nineteen days had come and gone since that first night his female had care for him and then fallen asleep with him under the stars and she continued to do so. He glanced down at the blankets covering him from lower torso to the soles of his feet. When the first night had passed and Kagome work to realize he had not used the blankets she took it upon herself to cover him every night before she settled into her own odd but efficient blanket.

She never voiced one word of protest, always calmly doing whatever needed to be done. Then again, she didn't say many words at all at this point in time. The more time she had spent receiving his non-committal answer or often no answer at all, the more she had begun to cut herself off when she realized she was talking and then the less she spoke at all. Though she now tried to be silent unless it was necessary to be otherwise she still greeted him good morning and bid him good night without fail. Oddly, while she had continued to become more reserved his anger had grown and he had begun to speak more often. He regretted and detested the fact that instead of offering some sort of comfort or reassurance to his tiny female his hopeless frustration often came out instead and his words would be practically dripping with derision. Although he understood logically why she was being this way and that it was indeed caused by him, subconsciously he felt as though she were blocking him, ignoring him, even making him invisible in her regard. It seemed no matter how often he tried to remember otherwise he did in fact involuntarily resent her and that feeling constantly battled his resentment for himself, neither emotion achieving functional dominancy in his thoughts.

One thing that had not changed these past days was her arousal for him. If anything it had become stronger. As a fact he was not sure he would ever be able to remain soft when served warm sugared peaches, his favorite dessert, again for the smell was almost exact to her essence. She shuddered dramatically and his eyes greedily followed the movement. Golden orbs became shadowed by narrowed lids as he recognized the signs of a human's discomfort due to their amplified sensitivity to cold. She had fought her was out of her strange blanket the night before when the temperature had been high. Now even as he studied her petite form she shifted from the fetal position to her back, one leg flush to the ground while the other was bent to the air with her thighs parted. Last evening she had donned a garment for sleeping which held similarities to a yukata only different in the fact that it was…arousing, a blessing, a curse, TINY. It was also striking as the color was dark blue, like the sash he wore across his hips, with silver accents making her creamy skin practically glow. The opening at the bottom of the gown and its short length along with his vantage point allowed him a view of her decadent undergarments that was not impeded in any way. They were silver in color with little designs in the strange threading and so damn thin he could easily see that her mons was completely free of any hair. He growled with the knowledge that it was also visibly glistening with juices he was beginning to believe he might just be willing to fight for centuries just to taste. Instantly his cock grew so hard that he couldn't contain a small grunt as he discovered it was also extremely sensitive as it jerked against his silk hakama.

He shifted restlessly when his ears heard her heart pick up speed and she rolled her hips sensually. Sesshomaru growled low and long as he observed her hips repeat the action. He stilled when she moaned and moved her head back and to the side, baring her throat, while her lower body never paused its visual torture of the lord. Thinking quickly back over the last minute his brows drew down as he wondered if she was now reacting to the sound of his voice. "Little female?" He questioned quietly attempting to sound calm although it was impossible for his words to banish the husky growling quality his voice took on whenever he was this far gone in his emotions. Sesshomaru tried to reign himself in though currently it felt like a losing battle as more of his control slipped away. Another long breathy moan left lips two shades darker than normal from the way she was nibbling on their fullness. Her hips rotated in a particularly needy motion as a sharp, "Ah!" pierced the air.

He leaned forward with demonic speed before catching himself in the action his lip lifted silently exposing a deadly fang as if with distaste. Only another good reason to remain resolute to stay away from her! He was not supposed to feel this intensely or frequently and he was certainly not used to it. Except this woman; this sweet, tiny, tempting, vulnerable, weak, courageous, beautiful fool of a woman; made his chest ache and body react without even doing a thing. Kagome literally stripped his control away in a matter of seconds. The control he had honed over his centuries of life. At this point her breath was so labored each new exhale was announced by the ha, ha, noises of soft panting. Focusing on her breathing brought rapt attention to her breasts as they fairly bounced in response. She had one hand curled up daintily in her hair next to her face while the other rested low, the tips of her fingers at the top of that sweet treasure. A strap had slid off her shoulder and with all her movements he could see the swell and some of the tempting darkened skin of her areola on her left breast. Just the sight had the snarl still on his face expressing itself verballing, now revealing his struggle not to go to her. At the sound a sultry whimper escaped the human as her head thrashed side to side in a desperate fashion.

Confused again, Sesshomaru wondered why all this activity had not yet caused the woman to wake. **She has submitted her subconscious being to our control, succumbing to the powerful influence of the deep bond we share. At this time I do not wish for her to wake. I am instead enjoying the images I have provided for her dreams and her honest, pleasing reactions.** Looking at his female with hazy red and gold eyes he instantly latched onto the subtle quivering in her thighs as she continued to pant. It affected him in such a profound way he had already grasped his dick by the time he thought to stop himself from reaching for that part of his anatomy.

Trying to distract himself he questioned his beast when he was denied access to cross the threshold to the section of her mind where a dream played out that was quite obviously sexual in nature. **_You said your bond is strong enough to interact with and view her dreams but if that is the case then why would I be denied such?_**

There was the sound of a deep sigh echoing in his mind before the hushed, more reserved reply reached him, **Because I have accepted the little female in every way for what she is. She was born for me; to be my strength, salvation, heart and soul. Basically she is OUR everything. You have not though you should have long ago, but let us put these redundant thoughts to rest for now.** In a sly voice now, **Though I'm sure there is no need for me to remind you there are other ways for our influence to work.**His manipulation was supported by how the demon's eyes wouldn't even dare to blink for fear of missing this sight of Kagome. Even so, Sesshomaru knew his beast was implying he should talk her through how he wanted to see her bring herself to climax. He was unsure that would be a moral action and did not want to cause more trouble. Now a scoffing noise occurred before, **Go to her. You know how you affect her. This is not something she would not do if you just asked, I'm sure. It will simple be more comfortable for her this way…and possibly give you a strong inkling as you fight not only yourself and out female but even the universe itself.**He winced. Something about hearing that he fought his woman felt just fundamentally wrong and he thought he would always feel that way no matter the context. Trying to arrange his thoughts was becoming increasingly difficult so he chose to act on the instinct he knew he wouldn't be able to continue to resist. It was liberating!


End file.
